This series of blog posts talks about my move from Los Angeles to San Jose. It is my aim to be honest with you about my struggles and challenges as I pack up and head to unfamiliar territory. I hope you can relate to my experience as I learn how to resettle and put down roots, again.

Future Tense

The landlord showed us his empty house with pride. As my husband and I walked through the living room, I tried to picture our family spending Sunday afternoons on the couch. I imagined my son sitting at the dining table and working on his homework while I cooked in the kitchen. I took a stroll in the backyard, wondering how many kids could be entertained for my son’s birthday parties. Was this the right house for us?

We surveyed three houses and seven schools during our five-day trip to San Jose last week. The purpose of the trip was to find a good school for my son and a suitable house for our small family. We will be moving from Los Angeles to San Jose in a couple of months.

As we toured schools and houses and roamed the streets of Silicon Valley, my mind worked overtime trying to visualize my future. I was moving from a familiar place to a strange one. I was uncertain how different my life would be or how much it would change.

Not knowing the details about my future made me anxious. Doubts and questions buzzed in my head.

The future was elusive, and it made me feel out of control.

When I confided in a friend about my fears, she told me that her family too had moved several times in the past. She bubbled with joy as she reflected on God’s faithfulness towards her during times of constant change and uncertainty. She looked at her past with gratitude and excitement, and encouraged me to trust God with my future.

God used a simple conversation with a friend to steer my thoughts away from my future, and towards my own past. This was not the first time I was moving. I had moved across continents, countries, and cities. I grappled with the unknown and the unfamiliar way too many times to count.

But as I looked back, I recalled God’s kindness towards me—ever present and unchanging. He provided friends and community. He comforted me when I felt lonely. God guided my family through the big and small decisions that moving entailed. He took care of us, in ways that left us in awe of His sovereignty.

Looking back gave me the strength and hope to look ahead. The past and the present have taught me that God is sovereign and immutable. I do not know my future but I know my God. I can step into unfamiliar territory with boldness and confidence, knowing that it is He who is in control.

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